I wish I lived in Narnia

So, the past week or so has been pretty good. For the first time ever last Wednesday I actually had a nice day! In the morning Lucie told the girls that they could go to the cinema in the afternoon if and only if they were well behaved going to and from Pony club. This included: no whinging, no stropping, no sulking, no hitting and no being a bitch. Normally I suspect this wouldn't work, but the week before we were going to go to a restaurant for lunch if they were well behaved, but me and Juliette had a screaming match trying to get her to put her shoes on, so I just walked off shouting 'okay well nevermind, we're not going to the restaurant then', and we didn't go, so I think they knew that if they pissed me off we wouldn't go. (Having said that, I didn't really want to go to a restaurant, but I would have put up with a lot to go to the cinema. Juliette and I did kind of argue over the outfit she wanted to wear and then again when she decided that 2 minutes before lunch was served would be the optimum time to have a nap, but like I said, I wanted to go so I kind of ignored it.) Anyway, this new found power meant that they were little delights there and back. Well, Juliette managed to fall over whilst chucking a snowball at me - karma if ever I saw it - and started crying, but I made her walk it off and she was fine within 2 minutes.

It started snowing while we were at Pony, really heavily, and settling. It was like Narnia! Only with fewer magical creatures, which was a disappointment. It was also freeeeezing - the temperature must have dropped dramatically while we were there - and Zoe came in after her lesson sobbing hysterically because her feet were so cold. Not nice! I made her put on my fluffy socks and move closer to the furnace that was burning in there, but she carried on crying for like, 20 minutes. I called her mum in a moment of desperation who told me to take off her wet socks and put them on the furnace. One of the socks then proceeded to burn to a crisp. Whoops! This did, however, cheer Zoe up sufficiently to enable me to persuade her to put her boots back on and leave to go home - luckily she had her bike, so it was pretty speedy.

The film was really good! It was the Princess and the Frog, and obviously it was in French, so I didn't understand all of it - damn musical numbers being impossible to understand - but it was funny and there were cute characters and it was a nice story line and... yeah! I recommend it to any Disney fans. I'm glad they've made a new one. It's set in the New Orleans Jazz-era, which is really cool, I love that kind of jazz, and there is a trumpet playing alligator! What more could you want? Oh wait, how about a small hillbilly fly? Check. Crazy swamp voodoo woman? Check. Evil villainous villain? Checkity check. Jealous sidekick? Check. Arrogant prince who turns nice? Checkamundo. Strong independent heroine? Check. Voila, a classic Disney film.

We skipped tennis afterwards 'cause Zoe didn't want to go and I sure couldn't be bothered to take her (it was cold!), so we went home and played Monopoly. Now, given that Juliette can neither read nor count, I was pretty impressed by how well she played! She seemed to enjoy herself a lot - largely playing with the little dog and ship and hat - and made a crap load of money through a lot of good dice rolls. You know how there's always someone every time you play who lands on everything? That was her. It's normally my cousin - we used to play with her everytime we saw her until my brother and I got fed up of always losing. Now we refuse to play - our current game of choice is Risk! Of course, there's always someone who never lands on anything - usually my mum - and in this case it was Zoe who was getting a bit stressed by the end 'cause she had barely anything. I managed to get three of the train stations! Woo!

Thursday and Friday were pretty uneventful - I didn't eat with the kids either night which was lovely and relaxing. On Friday I got distracted by youtube and forgot to do any of the cleaning so, knowing that neither of the parents would be home until about 7, I stuck the kids in front of the TV when we got home and did it then. I would feel bad about this except they always want to watch TV, so I figure they were happy. I'm sure French parents are much stricter about TV than my parents ever were. I'm sure I used to get to watch TV every day when I came in before doing my homework. These guys are allowed to watch it very rarely - Tuesday is meant to be TV night because we go to the library and rent a DVD, but I'm not sure how much they're allowed to watch it apart from that. I'm pretty sure they're not meant to watch it as much as I let them, but the other day Zoe literally whinged for about 15 minutes because she 'couldn't think of anything else to do'. Despite my insisting that 'if she couldn't think of anything else to do other than watch tv, that probably means she watches too much tv' (how old do I sound?!), she continued to mope until I decided that frankly, I wanted to read my book, so I let her watch it. I pointed out that she 'hadn't won!', but she knew she had really!

Over the weekend I decided it was time to rectify my trouser situation - I only have 2 pairs and over the past 2 months they have both decided that really large holes in the crotch are 'in' this season. Consequently I have been sewing them up on a regular basis, because it's a bit too cold for tights. I couldn't find anyone to go shopping with - the problems with limited friend access - so I went alone which is always fun. I am just going to say this now - shopping in Paris is not fun. I hate it. There are 2 streets which are meant to be pretty good for high street shopping - rue de rivoli and rue de rennes - and they are both MILES long. MILES!! I miss Leeds and its compact town centre. I am not a flea market/second hand shop/vintage shop kind of girl, so all those little areas are out, and I am definitely not a haute couture girl, so that rules out most of the Latin Quarter. I decided to go to the big shopping mall next to Chatelet-Les-Halles, which is underground. Not exactly what comes immediately to mind when you think of shopping in Paris, huh? Still, it was compact and there were a lot of shops close together. I managed to spend almost the entire day going exclusively into shops found almost everywhere in the world - H&M, Zara, Gap and, bizarrely, New Look. I know, who'd have thought?! Oh, and WH Smiths. I bought a Terry's Chocolate Orange bar, some Hobnobs and some Fanta fruit twist. I love that shop! Anyway, mission was completed - I bought 3 pairs of trousers, although unfortunately I couldn't be bothered to try on 2 of them in H&M because the queue was too long, and I don't really like them now I've tried them on, so I guess I'll be returning them! But, mission partially completed, at least! I managed not to get seriously depressed about my wobbly bits, so that's a bonus! I much prefer shopping in England though, it's weird. I will undoubtedly come back from Leeds next week with a better idea of why that is, but at the moment it's just like a funny feeling I get whenever I'm out shopping here, like my shopping experience isn't really optimum. I miss colourful shop windows, and familiar shops, and... I dunno. We'll see.

Anyway, I guess I'd better get on with actually doing my job. Ernest is asleep already, so I'm free until 4pm, but I should probably hoover or something.

P.S. No injuries as of yet this week, but it's early days! I have decided to start keeping a tally - some weeks it is quite astonishing how much they manage to fall down or walk into things or stab themselves with things or get punched by one of their siblings.

The beginning

So, five months ago tomorrow (9th September 2009), I made a 5 hour trip up from Perpignan, France, where I was on holiday with my friends, to start life as a full-time aupair in Rueil Malmaison, Paris. I was joining the Desprez family - Lucie and Eric = Mum and Dad (or Maman and Papa), and they work full time (no idea what they do) in La Defense, so I am, from 8h15 to 19h in charge of their three children: Zoe, 8; Juliette, 5; and Ernest, 2. I'm also in charge of cooking and keeping the house clean and tidy. Anyone who knows me will know how hilarious this last part is - especially my old housemates! However, I seem to have a knack for keeping other people's houses tidy; my room is still a tip, but Lucie seems happy with the job I am doing upstairs, so no worries! I live in the basement room, next to the laundry room. It's a really awesome deal,I have my own bathroom and little kitchen (complete with sink, hobs and microwave/oven. Oh yeah, I know - try and keep the jealousy to a minimum!) and even my own front door. Unfortunately, that doesn't work at the moment, but hey, it's there to look at!

So this blog is going to be about the trials and tribulations, but also the fun times, that come with being an aupair. Kids are truly hilarious... well, when they're not sulking or screaming at you or ignoring you or, worse, speaking a different language! Because, of course, these kids are French and as such, require a whole lotta speaking to in French. Luckily (or not, depending on whether you're my mum or not), Lucie is half American and therefore bilingual, and consequently Zoe understands English to an astonishingly good level, given that she refuses to ever speak it. So if I'm having issues with conjugations (damned conjugations...) I can switch into English and she'll understand which is nice. Juliette refuses to understand me - her favourite phrase is 't'as dit QUOI?' which means 'WHAT did you say?' - so I have to talk to her in French, and Ernest is 2 and therefore doesn't necessarily understand whatever language you talk to him in, so because I really really badly want him to be a cute little bilingual kid, I talk to him in English. The amount he understands now, compared to when I arrived, is really quite astonishing, but then the amount he talks compared to when I arrived it pretty astonishing. When I arrived he pretty much just said 'maman', 'papa' 'erci' (merci - thanks), 'ti' (please) and 'no', but now he responds to questions, calls me by my name (or, an approximation - 'Ka!') attracts my attention - 'regar Ka' = look, Kate!, and can almost ask for things, though he does have a tendency to just go 'THAT' and then 'pleeeeeeee' with a big grin on his face, the cheeky scamp. My French has probably suffered somewhat as a result of all this English, but it's definitely improved; this weekend I went to Rennes for a party with one of my friends from school who's on his year abroad there, and I was able to chat happily for hours in French! So although it's not been the greatest environment for picking up French, it's clearly helped!

When I took the job, Eric did an awesome job of describing the kids to me - a 40 year old man doing an impression of a feisty 4 year old girl has to be one of my best moments. As it turned out, his descriptions of them weren't exactly what I would call accurate. He described Zoe as 'eager to please everyone', Juliette as 'wanting to be grown up' and.. well, as mentioned, Ernest is 2. Honestly, not a whole lot you can say.

Anyway, when I got there, I couldn't believe he'd described Zoe as eager to please - I've never met anyone sulkier (including me, Mother) or less willing to do what I ask them. We went through a real bad patch in October/November when she literally sulked EVERY time I asked her to do anything or denied her something e.g. tv or more snacks. I, ashamed though I am to admit it, screamed at her quite unacceptably a couple of times - but hey, I'm young, and kids are freaking annoying. My mum helped me a LOT through that time, and honestly, if you ever have kids, something she said to me is a key thing to remember: when they're being unloveable, that's when they need your love the most. Something changed though (I like to think due to hard work and a whoooole lotta patience from me), end of November, and we became buddies, and now, although I don't quite agree with Eric's description, she is a truly lovely kid. She's really arty and funny and cute, and barely sulks at all anymore!

Juliette was a little terror when I got there - sulky and totally unresponsive, which is an understandable response to a new stranger coming into your house and bossing you around - the reason I kind of get why Zoe was like that, but she perked up around the time Zoe got awful (they're never all nice at once) and became really cute and funny. She's got a good sense of humour and she can be very adorable when she wants to be. Unfortunately, and this is becoming a real issue at the moment, she is the slowest kid I have ever had the bad luck to look after. It's not that I have to tell her we're leaving at least 10, if not 15, minutes before we leave - that I don't mind, kids are on a different timetable, I get it - but the fact that I then have to repeat myself at least twenty times before she'll even come downstairs and then another twenty to make her get her shoes on, by which time I am so pissed off and late I practically shove her in her coat. This happens almost every day.

On to a nicer topic - Ernest. Such a cutie. Big brown eyes, cute little grin... I just wanna eat him! Also, 2 year olds are so much nicer because they pretty much do as they're told, and if they don't, you can pick them up and make them do as they're told! Ernest likes duplo, being read to, chattering away to himself and hugs. I love hugs! He says 'anklooo' for 'thank you' and 'pleeee' for please. He also has started saying 'back?' when I tell him to put things back, which is a break through, because he doesn't say anything else English. He falls over a lot - today he fell over and cut his lip. In fact, all the kids fall over and hurt themselves all the time. Well, Zoe less so, apart from one 'hilarious' incident involving her, a pushchair, a hill, and going to fast, but we won't go into that... Juliette managed to fall over 3 times and get trodden on by a pony in one week (and boy, did she not let me forget it)!

I have a nice little routine during the week, it works out pretty well. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday, the girls are at school from when I start work - I don't have to take them to school which is good! - until 4.30pm. Well, Zoe has homework club Monday and Friday and a private tutor Tuesday and Thursday... I know, she's 8. It's terrifying. So actually, I don't ever get her from school at 4.30. Juliette has After-School Club Thursdays, so I go get her at 6pm those days. It's actually a pretty complicated routine - they're pretty busy kids. Anyway, as you may have noticed, they don't go to school on Wednesdays! So unfair! And what do we do on Wednesdays, I hear you ask? WELL! It's a whole barrel of laughs. I have to practically drag them kicking and screaming out the door to go to Poney Club, which is a 15 minute walk up a HUGE hill, which I usually have to pull Juliette up - last week I had to push her there in the pushchair because her 'bobo (injury) was hurting'. I could barely breathe when we got there and she kept asking me why I was so tired. Aagh! Anyway, so then I have to sit there for 2 hours in the freezing cold, surrounded by horses which I hate. Then we have to go through another at least half an hour of Juliette walking really slowly back home and me and Zoe shouting at her the whole way to hurry up. However, good news! Juliette has decided to quit 'cause she's scared of horses (sensible girl) and Zoe didn't resubscribe in time for the next semester. Cue manical happy laughter. I am so happy to be free of that weekly torture! Words cannot even describe. Now we get to do fun stuff like going to Parc de Villettes and the science museum there! Zoe has tennis at 4, but that's just an excuse for me to go into town and send post or cash pay cheques, so not really an issue. Ernest goes to Creche all day Wednesdays, which is nice for the girls because it means they get to do big girl stuff, and it's so lovely when I go to get him at the end of the day and he leaps up in delight yelling 'Ka!' when he sees me. Definitely makes it all worthwhile :)

As jobs go, I've definitely got it pretty easy most of the time - Ernest sleeps all afternoon! - and there are some really cute moments. We made fairy cakes last Wednesday and decorated them with insane coloured icing, and this morning Ernest and I played dinosaurs, and we do colouring and play with playdough and stuff like that. It's nice to embrace my childish side! The other day, for example, we played cops and robbers for an hour outside (I got blown up and captured more times than I care to remember!). The cleaning as well, I don't mind. I just did almost two hours of ironing and caught up on my youtube TV at the same time (thank you, oh kind generous people who put QI up on youtube. I love you)! In a minute I am going to go wake Ernest up, give him some snacks, go get Juliette from school and then spend an hour in the library. Definitely a nice way to spend the evening! Also, it's TV night tonight! Woo!

Anyway, I guess I'll see where this blog goes; I'll try to make it mainly about funny stuff that happens to me, rather than the negative stuff, although I may need to vent every now and again!

P.S. It snowed today again. Stop snowing already!!